


I Now (Secretly) Pronounce You

by WednesdaysDaughter



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Eloping, F/M, Family Feels, Fluff, M/M, Scott McCall & Stiles Stilinski Friendship, Secret Marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-12
Updated: 2015-03-12
Packaged: 2018-03-17 14:32:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3532901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WednesdaysDaughter/pseuds/WednesdaysDaughter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Let’s get married,” he whispers before nipping at Stiles’ swollen lips and they’re covered in hickies when the judge declares them husband and husband two hours later.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Now (Secretly) Pronounce You

**Author's Note:**

> I've had a horrible case of writer's block recently and was rereading some of my older fic and came across a comment about how much they loved the idea of Stiles and Derek eloping and yeah - this happened.

Years later, when gray hairs battle chestnut for dominance, Stiles will swear up and down that if it hadn’t been for the jealous succubus, his and Derek’s honeymoon would’ve been perfect.

Derek on the other hand, will shake his head and admit it was doomed the minute they decided to elope while running an errand for Deaton in Arizona.

Needless to say, they’d both be wrong.

\- - - - - - - - - -

“We should get married.”

Derek, who’s used to Stiles dropping bombs out of the blue, merely glances briefly at him before turning his attention back to the endless stretch of road in front of them.

“I’m serious!”

Derek hums noncommittally and waits for the inevitable list of reasons why getting married would be a great idea, but when Stiles doesn’t immediately begin, Derek sighs and pulls into a gas station straight out of a horror movie.

Turning the car off he pivots in his seat to give Stiles his undivided attention and regrets do so when he sees the dejected look on Stiles’ face.

“Hey,” he soothes, taking Stiles’ hand in his, “what brought this up? I thought we were happy just doing our thing?”

Stiles' lips twitch, suddenly eighteen and determined to keep Derek in his bed sans titles that made them both a little uneasy due to their stellar dating history. Four years later and their lack of definition and future plans seemed to be working just perfectly.

Until Scott had to go get married that is.

Since the ceremony Stiles had been acting cagey and suddenly the inspiring speech he gave years ago didn’t seem so inspiring.

“Do you not want to get married?” Stiles asks and Derek doesn’t dignify that with a response; choosing to stare at Stiles until he snorted.

“Okay, that was a stupid question. Here’s another: Do you not want to get married to me?”

Derek glares this time and his grip on Stiles’ hand tightens.

“Okay, okay I get it. You totally love me and stuff. Forget I said anything.”

“You know I can’t do that Stiles.”

Stiles ran his free hand through his hair and grimaced.

The following silence was deafening, well at least it was to Stiles. Derek could hear the frantic pitter-pat of Stiles’ heart and knew the issue wasn’t just going to disappear so he restarted the car and held Stiles’ hand all the way to their motel. They fell into bed without speaking, minds too busy to form words and when morning came they were too tired to get up with the sun.

Derek left to get breakfast and when he came back Stiles was still in bed, curled up in a ball facing away from the door and the thin curtains that did little to keep the sun out. Derek placed the bags on the table and molded his body around Stiles’.

“There’s a courthouse a couple blocks down.”

Either Stiles’ brain is still waking up or he’s too shocked to say anything right away. Derek lets him work through it before nuzzling into Stiles’ neck and weighing the benefits of falling back asleep.

Stiles doesn’t let him.

Getting tangled in the sheets, Stiles quickly turns around and props himself up on Derek’s chest.

“Are you fucking with me right now Derek because I swear to God if you are I will leave your furry ass here to get eaten by a sandworm.”

“Sandworms are real?” Derek asks curiously and Stiles doesn’t have time to roll his eyes before Derek’s leaning up to steal a kiss. Stiles melts into Derek, tangling his fingers in Derek’s soft henley and groaning when Derek’s hands move to cup his ass. They grind against each other for a hot second before Derek pulls away.

“Let’s get married,” he whispers before nipping at Stiles’ swollen lips and they’re covered in hickies when the judge declares them husband and husband two hours later.

\- - - - - - - - - -

“Scott is going to be so pissed,” Stiles whines.

“Pissed that you nearly got yourself killed or pissed that you got married without him?” Lydia pulls the glass out of Stiles’ shoulder with more force than strictly necessary.

“Fuck! Forget Scott, you might kill me first.”

“Oh quit being such a baby Stilinski.”

“Would you two shut up before I kill you both?” Derek growls before gripping the stake lodged in his shoulder and yanking it out with a strangled yell.

“Real nice Der, threatening your husband on your honeymoon,” Stiles hisses.

“Only you two would stumble across a ring of succubi sex line operators when you were sent here to pick up a spell book for Deaton.”

“It’s not our fault,” Stiles defends, “Deaton’s cousin Sara asked us to look into some shady business and we did.”

Lydia looks unimpressed and Stiles goes back to grumbling under his breath as she wraps his shoulder more gently than when she began. Derek’s wounds have healed by the time Stiles is cleared to walk and they fall into each other, hands roaming over limbs carefully.  

Before their Eskimo kisses could morph into a heavy make-out session, Lydia clears her throat and ushers them to the car where their bags and spell book are waiting to be taken back to Beacon Hills.

They’re passing the “Now Leaving Arizona” sign when Lydia speaks up.

“By the way, Scott says you’re a dead man.”

Stiles’ groan lasts a half-mile before he asks Derek to bail out of the car with him before it’s too late.

Derek presses a kiss to Stiles’ head and grins.

“I’m pretty sure it’s three days too late.”

\- - - - - - - - - -

“Where’s my new son-in-law?”

Derek’s swept into a Stilinski hug before he can get his bearings straight. Stiles’ is given the same treatment by Kira and then Melissa, but Scott stands away from the crowd with his arms crossed tightly over his chest.

“Aw, come on buddy don’t be like that!” Stiles begs, limping over to Scott who looks like he’s going to crumble when he takes in Stiles’ injuries.

“Dude, you promised.” Scott mopes and Stiles deflates so quickly, Derek nearly rushes over to catch him.

“We were like six when we made that promise Scott! Cut me some slack.”

“I upheld my end of the deal Stiles, you were my best man.”

 “Are they about to break up?” Malia asks Kira and Kira has to bite her lip to keep from laughing, something neither Melissa nor the Sheriff attempt.

“If the Cookie War of second grade didn’t break these two up, this certainly won’t.” Melissa assured Malia and this time Kira couldn’t stop her giggles.

“Claudia and I found crumbs around the house for six months after that tragic day,” the Sheriff said wistfully fighting back his smile.

“Guys we’re having a moment over here. Can you try to be serious for a second?” Stiles asks affronted and he can feel the collective eye roll in his bones.

“Oh for heaven’s sake boys, Stiles and Derek can have a second ceremony here in town. Now stop being idiots and hug already. I’m pretty sure I need to stitch up some of Stiles’ wounds and I’d like to get that done before my shift tonight.”

Melissa’s commanding voice knocks Scott and Stiles into action who eye each other carefully before breaking and coming to meet in the middle of a hug that lasts three solid minutes.

“I’m sorry I got married without you.”

“I’m sorry I switched your champagne to a non-alcoholic brand so you wouldn’t make any embarrassing best man speeches.”

“That was you?” Stiles asks, betrayed and Scott looks away chagrined.

Before Stiles can say anything else, Derek comes over and yanks him gently away and shoves him towards Melissa who has her medical kit in hand.

“Please sew up my husband before he bleeds to death.”

“With pleasure.”

Stiles protests the entire way into the Stilinski house, but no one pays him any mind. Instead they begin to plan a second wedding with Scott and Derek bringing up the rear.

“So, I guess this makes us brothers… again.” Scott nudges Derek’s shoulder with his own.

The soft smile Derek gives him makes Scott’s initial hurt lessen.

The recipe Derek gives him later for wolfsbane champagne makes it disappear completely.

**Author's Note:**

> I guess this is canon compliant? I mean like I didn't mention Allison or anyone else who died/left, but I didn't really want to go too in-depth with where/when this was. It's in the future, Derek and Stiles are a thing, and that's all that matters. 
> 
> Side note: I miss Allison so much and am very upset Tyler H. is not going to be a season regular in s5. This is how I cope: Sterek fluff. I need to write something with Allison in in next. I might add to my Buffy!TW series I started forever ago.


End file.
